Hey Y'all from Texas Here?

They do EVERYTHING big in Texas!

"And now, will y'all stand and be recognized?"
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis to a group of handicapped people in wheelchairs

"Lemme give ya' a hypothetic."
- Texas Rep. Renal Rosson

"Oh good. Now he'll be bi-ignorant."
- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower when told that Texas Governor Bill Clements had been studying Spanish

"I'd just make a little bit of money, I wouldn't make a whole lot."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis defending himself against the charge that he would personally profit from a bill he introduced.

"Well, there never was a Bible in the room."
- Texas Governor Bill Clements, asked about repeatedly lying about the SMU football scandal

"I am filled with humidity."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"If ignorance ever goes to $40 a barrel, I want drillin' rights on that man's head."
- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower discussing President George Bush's policies

"If it's dangerous to talk to yourself, it's probably even dicier to listen..."
- Texas Agriculture Commissioner Jim Hightower

"I move we recess to go outside and throw up."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis during a budget hearing

"Let's do this in one foul sweep."
- Texas House Speaker Bill Clayton

"This is unparalyzed in the state's history."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"I want to thank each and every one of you for having extinguished yourselves this session."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"We'll run it up the flagpole and see who salutes that booger."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"There's a lot of uncertainty that's not clear in my mind."
- Texas House Speaker Gib Lewis

"There are still places where people think that the function of the media is to provide information."
- Don Rottenberg